CIRCUS

I have always believed strongly and deeply in the power of words and have found in them my solace. Whenever I failed to express myself to the people around me, I wrote poems and letters and in these I discovered a freedom of expression that speech could never offer. I never publicly published any of my creations but after much deliberation, I have finally decided to post here one of my poems. I hope you enjoy it!

CIRCUS

Light turns to dark 

Night turns to day 

Sitting in the same spot 

Saying I am okay 

Repeating the mantra 

Interrupting the circus 

Thoughts like a wildfire 

Rapid, no purpose 

A blank look on my face 

So it is invisible 

The hurricane in my mind 

Bloody invincible

I keep trying to be normal 

To go back to who I was 

But, who was I, exactly? 

Damn, I am at a loss 

Don’t remember how I felt 

Don’t remember being me 

Yet I am scared of being forgotten 

Do you see the irony?

The worst part however 

Is not knowing what I feel 

It is like a silent movie 

An audio-less reel 

And then there is the silence 

It’s way too loud 

I try to speak up 

Only to find I am locked out 

In the end I am still unsure 

If I should cry or laugh 

‘Cause I am the royal lion 

In the garb of a clown 

I am laughing at myself

But I eventually find 

I am the prisoner and the jailer 

Of the hell that is my mind.